09/01/2014 - Managing Self Esteem
Low self-esteem generally comes from a long term conditioning process that starts when we were young. Throughout our earlier stages of development we listened to those around us that we looked at for our main source of acceptance. This can be our parents, carers, friends, relations and those we were in relationships. Can you remember what things were said to you as you were growing up? Were you made to feel that you were "OK" for who and how you were?
As we progress through life, we "take on" a perception of who we are and how we should be, based on what we have listened to. If we have been taught some negative outlooks then, as we travel through life, we search for any shortcomings we have to reinforce these negative beliefs. Before too long anything and everything "proves" that we are "no good" and that we have to accept just the way we are. Our relationships fail, our work fails and when our self-esteem hits close to the bottom, every aspect of our life starts to fail.
Low self-esteem isn't like a broken bone, you can't cast it and six weeks later it's all better. No one else can see the reason why you are "different", it's not something you can see, but it is far more detrimental than any broken bone.
Unfortunately, low self-esteem takes a committed long term effort to understand and change. It is a habit and it has been reinforced consciously and subconsciously for, some people, a lifetime. You can change your perception of yourself, but first you have to want to change. Some people enjoy the rewards they receive for having low self-esteem and this can "lock" them into this mindset therefore their outlook never changes.
If you want change, then I can help you. You will have noticed the word "perception" used in this article. In the article, we will look at disputing your current maladaptive perceptions and replacing them with some accurate perceptions, perceptions that will empower you to be all that you can be. Remember the longest journey starts with the first step ... Are you ready?